Shame SpiralS

Have you ever been in a shame spiral? A shame spiral is what happens when you are feeling bad about yourself. So bad that you can't exercise and must eat/drink wine and then continue to feel bad about yourself because you didn't exercise and ate and drank wine. The worst thing is that instead of the books that I should be reading (see the picture) I am back on watching "Weeds". It is the only thing that can bring me joy. I am in a shame spiral.

Question Time

So, I was doing some editing of my blog, you know the kind where you post something and notice a typo. Oops. I was starting to notice a lot of question asking in mine. Here is a new and important question: Am I turning into a Carrie Bradshaw wannabe? You know, "I couldn't help but wonder, does the apple really not fall far from the tree?" (I don't think that is really one but it is probably close.) or "I couldn't help but wonder, are we shoulding all over ourselves?" I actually liked that one because I totally do that. I continuously feel guilty for things I think that I ought to have done. It is exhausting.

So, I couldn't help but wonder, are all these questions annoying or do they speak to my scientific/introspective nature?

While I am asking questions is blogger not hip anymore? Should I find a new place to put my blog so more friends (and by friends I mean strangers) will read it? I heard Tumblr is where it is at.

Keeping a Low Profile

I was typing in a label for a recent post and one of the little autofill ideas the computer gave me was Bromance. That got me a little nostalgic for the days where I could watch MTV whenever I wanted and think about Brody Jenner and the lucky man who would be his new best friend. It got me wondering/missing him. What is he up to now?
The answer is a little disappointing. My investigative journalism skills uncovered him keeping a mostly low profile. It looks like he is surfing and hanging around with his lady friend Avril Lavigne. Not that exciting. Oh well, at least Audrina and her fam are going to have a new reality show. I have never been more thankful for the lack of cable.

Music in My Future

My music taste is something one might call eclectic. I listen to only top 40 and the college rap station in Spokane. Luckily the internet and some billboards have reminded me of other types of music I used to enjoy.

This billboard has recently replaced the Chippendale's billboard I had grown accustomed to seeing on my route home. I think the reason they took it down was because the show had been sold out for quite some time. There was a sold out sign placed on it after a a week, two tops. This made me want to a) sing end of the road and b) go to a concert. The tickets to this show were 50 dollars per person, too expensive.

Then I found out the Old 97s were playing in Spokane. These tickets were in my price range and despite the fact that it is a Tuesday/school night I am going to see them at the Bing Crosby theater. This genre of music is perfect for me. A little country, a little rock, a little acoustic guitar. I can't wait.

Once I started thinking about concerts and planning ahead I couldn't stop. I was thinking about how much fun Warren and I had a Sasquatch last year (even though we were the oldest people there.) I made Warren interested by telling him that Guided by Voices would be there. The tickets are already sold out for this years but I had a great time looking at the website which plays musical previews of bands and introduced me to Jenny and Johnny.

I truly love Rilo Kiley and also enjoy Jenny Lewis' solo/Watson Twins music. (Basically I just love Jenny Lewis.) I was so excited to find out that she was making music again. It has been about a year's worth of music but in my defense Warren is the person who would tell me about something like this and he has been kind of busy. I started listening to Jenny and Johnny and reading more about them. It looks like they have been around on Late Night tv (too late/no cable)) and Warren said "Oh yeah, I saw them. I just didn't think they were that good." Well, despite his opinion I like it.

Stay tuned. I am looking for an outdoor music opportunity. We will see.

My Crush

I went to a happy hour on Friday after work with some girl friends. We started talking about celebrities that may induce tears. (We were talking about the kind of celebrity you love so much you might cry if you happened upon them in your daily life.) Now everyone knows how I feel about Nick Lachey(We would just be great friends) but I don't know that I have a celeb that I would cry upon meeting, no Justin Beiber if you will.

I totally loved/still enjoy Dave Matthews but at the height of my love for him when I saw him in the Barnes and Noble in Seattle. I just followed him around and looked at him. I didn't have the guts to talk to him and I certainly didn't cry when I saw him. That is not what Seattle people do. We ignore our celebrities and that is why they like it there.

My current celebrity crush is Dax. I know he is not ruggedly handsome and seems kind of goofy but that is what I like about him. Warren knows/supports how much I love him. He even told me about an Adam Corolla podcast with him (I highly recommend both him and the Adam Corolla podcast).
Get to know Dax. Did you know?
He is on one of my current favorite tv shows, Parenthood. It usually can bring tears to my eyes, sappy I know but I like it.
He is a engaged to Kristen Bell ( I love her too!)
He is a motorcycle rider.
He got his start as, and I am quoting Wikipedia here, Ashton Kutcher's minion and a vomiter.

Who is your celeb crush?

Getting Political

The letter that I sent to my state reps, senator, and the governor. Will it do any good? Who knows but I tried my best (just like in Kindergarten) to do something. I sort of believe in the political process.

Here is the gist of my letter:

"I understand the realities of the state budget and know that some tough decisions must be made this year. As a teacher who is helping to support my husband as he goes back to school I would like to see the salary schedule remain unfrozen, the National Board stipend remain intact, and my healthcare benefits not be run by a more costly state run system because these things will make my life more difficult. But I am not choosing to write to you about those things today. I am choosing to write you about class size. If you want to do what is best for students then class size should be something that you fight to protect. I believe that a continued investment in education today will have long term payoff for all in the future because kids will be getting what they need and teachers will be able to help guide them towards success. I urge you to consider keeping class sizes low and at the top of the list of your priorities. Do not suspend I-728."


Washington state public education is in a dire situation. Write to your local representatives about education or about anything. I have gotten a few responses before.

The pessimist

This week was excruciatingly long and busy. After a particularly tough Monday at work I went up North to Babies R Us. This was a trip that I totally dreaded but a necessity for me as I had a baby shower to attend. On the way home I decided to treat myself to a Costplus World Market Trip ( I love that store.) After spotting some Adirondak chairs that I am keeping in mind for the summer and buying some cute cards, a teacup with built in diffuser, and a pretty orange trivet, I stumbled upon this. The Pessimist Cabernet Sauvignon seemed to fit my mood quite nicely. "Once opened and poured, the "half empty" sensation begins." I have this feeling that once I drink the bottle I can be a optimist again. I don't know about that but I am finally starting to feel like I am in less of a funk. This can be attributed to the happy hour I just enjoyed, girl scout cookies, sweats, wine and the fact that I did survive, even just barely, this week at school.

I Want This

I love the new LL Bean Signature Clothing. I love this shirt and about a hundred other things in this line.

A Blast From the Past

Did you ever read the Sweet Valley High books? They were an important part of my childhood and they are back. I read this article in the New York Times about the return of Jessica and Elizabeth in Sweet Valley Confidential and how they are all grown up. They are ingeniously marketing these books towards the 20/30 somethings who read them as kids. I don't usually like to read smut (yes, I said smut) but who doesn't want a chance to satisfy that childhood curiosity and see what happened to some of their favorite characters as they grew up. It sounds like there are some folks who are disappointed about the way the girls turned out. Whose life didn't turn out differently than they thought it would when they were 15 or 16? Mine certainly did. The real mind blowing detail in all of this is that while looking for a picture to put with this blog post I stumbled upon photos from a television show. I am sad that I didn't know about that when I was in high school. I might end up buying the book or checking it out from the library. That would definitely complete my trip down memory lane.

The end of the world as we know it

You may or may not know that Warren loves post-apocalyptic films and books. We spend a great deal of time together and I too have developed a love. I also like to think of it as research for prolonging my life after something bad happens. If you were wanting to gather skills and knowledge about living in a post-apocalyptic world. Here is a list to get you started. *Note: A few of these are as the apocalypse is going down but there are lessons to be learned none the less.

The Stand-Steven King mini-series- Lesson: plagues bring out the worst and best in people.

Blindness- Jose Saramago novel. I don't know that this counts but I have mentally filed it into this genre. This is really about the breakdown of society when things get bad. Lesson: Don't trust anyone!

Idiocracy- it seems dumb but it makes some valid points. I think of it quite a bit when I see people who are doing stupid things--the break down of society if you will. Lesson: Read Books now!

WallE- think about it people are too lazy to care or see what is happening. Lesson: We could be our own undoing (A lot of these have that as the lesson.)

Minority Report-Lesson: Don't hang with Tom Cruise. (I don't think that is really the lesson. I just don't like him.)

The Island-good looking clones to keep you alive forever. Yes! Lesson: Make lots of money to pay for the clones.

The Day After Tomorrow- Lesson: This is what happens when we don't take care of the environment

Children of Men- The book is better than the movie. Lesson: Make friends with a cabin/home off the beaten path.

I, Robot- Lesson: Be nice to your appliances

I am Legend - Lesson: What can I say? Will Smith gets it/Zombies are mean.

Planet of the Apes- an oldy but a goody. Lesson: Don't trust animals. Also, don't watch the Mark Wahlberg version ( I love him but don't kid yourself).

The Road- I think this was going to be/is a movie but I only read the book (kind of a bummer. that is really saying something for this genre)

Zombieland-comedic look at post apocalypse. Bill Murray is in it. Need I say more. Plenty of lessons to be had.

The Happening- this time Mark Wahlberg does get it (although he seems kind of funny to me when he is trying to be serious) Lesson: Plants are not to be trusted either.

The City of Ember and subsequent books- yes, these are children books but they are amazing none the less. Lesson: When faced with darkness don't wait to die. Go out and see what you can find. What do you have to lose? Also, kids are helpful in this area.

The next apocalypse movie that I will be reading: Alas, Babylon by Pat Frank

Reinvention

I have been thinking a lot about reinvention. What if you could change a lot of things in your life? or what if you had to make a major change in your life? Stupidly enough I have been thinking about it because I have been watching television shows that have gotten me to ponder this question. My Name is Earl, he was not a very good guy, he was in an accident and learned about Karma and now is trying to make right all the things that he did that were wrong. The show is silly but I think it is a neat idea. I also just started watching Samantha Who? She was in an accident and has amnesia. She was not a very nice person either and is now trying to change/learn things about herself. This one I think poses an interesting question: Do you like everything about yourself? If you forgot everything would you like what you learned? If you were going through a big life change would you see it as an opportunity to try again to make different choices? It really has me thinking about things in my own life. What would you change in yours?

Travel wish list

As of this August, Warren and I have begun to incur a large amount of debt and busyness making travel a nice diversion but not a very real possibility. If I could go anywhere in the world here is my current list of places to go.
Africa, Kenya to be specific

Paris, Italy, and Britain

Costa Rica

Seychelles

*I know that whining about this makes me sound like an ass. I was talking to someone about this and felt a little ill when I really heard what I sounded like. So forgive me. I know this is a rich person’s problem and am trying to keep this perspective.

The Song that I can't get out of my head (in a bad way)

I am sitting in Les Swab tires getting my snow tires removed, as the deadline is looming and yet it is still cold and snow still seems it may come, and listening to the radio. They have told me that I will have to wait for at least an hour and forty five minutes so I have plenty of time to think about my dislike of one particular song. I am sorry to say that the” I Was Born This Way,” Lady Gaga song is so annoying to me. There are number of things about it that bother me including the fact that each time I hear it I sing the words to Madonna’s Express Yourself and they fit perfectly. Perhaps it is an homage to Madonna and that would please me more. It also is one of those songs that is on all the time now and is easily stuck in your head because of the pulsing and repetitive nature of the music style. I can’t help but think that this is clearly pandering to her audience. I mean, I can appreciate that she really feels that way and she wants every to feel proud and acceptant of our unique differences but is this surprising that she feels that way? Not in the least. (I also don’t want it to seem that I feel or think counter to this. I feel that way too.) I think if Toby Keith was singing this song it would be much more powerful and shocking (and probably not well received by his typical fans). As a student of the protest/political songs of the past ( I wrote a culminating paper about this senior year of high school and got into Mount Holyoke because of it. Clearly I didn’t go.) I can appreciate how music can have a profound influence on social consciousness. I just do not like this song. I will just hold my breath and wait for the country music remake.

Wedding to Watch

I am getting excited about the upcoming nuptials of Kate and William. I know it will be on very early in the morning and am wondering if it would be appropriate for me to wake up and enjoy some Champagne as I watch/stay home from school that day to celebrate. Does that sound silly or ingenious? You be the judge.

An Ode to Seattle

I miss you Seattle. I was able to travel across the state very briefly to kick off my Spring Break. Although the weather was quite rainy, gray and dull, I can’t help but miss my home. Spokane is getting it done. I mean there are restaurants and shopping but nothing can compare with the place where I spent my late teens and twenties. It doesn't help that my closest friends live there to make me miss it even more. Until next time my old friend, I will be missing you and wishing to be home.