I'll always be that guy towards you (Is this some kind of a threat? You never can tell with Justin Bobby.)

The Hills



I might have missed an episode but trust me all you missed was Brody's birthday. Jayde pissed at Brody as usual. Kristin waiting for Justin Bobby and missing him but vowing not putting up with him. Oh, and Audrina is trying to get back at Justin by dating his friend. Take that.

Poor Lo she has to be friends with Kristin so that the viewers can understand what has gone on. What an unfortunate life she has.

Kristin goes back to Laguna to tell her dad and step mom about her life. Dad's review of Brody is that he is self-obsessed. How could someone that is has been on four reality tv shows be a narcissist?

At a Bolthouse promotion (wait they still employ Heidi?) Holly, Charlie, Heidi, Stephanie, and Spencer (sporting his faux cowboy gear) attend. Holly is hammered and drunkenly dancing and analyzing art (to Brent Bolthouse, he looks less than amused). Her dancing is radical.

She was out of control and Stephanie is really concerned. Every time they go out someone asks them to leave.

Justin Bobby, who has apparently been out of town, makes a meal to apologize to Kristin. They spend a lot of time talking about how much they don't want to be in relationships with each other and then head off camera to hook up.

Audrina continues to ruin dates by talking about Justin Bobby. Relationship advice:It makes it clear that you are not over someone when you talk about them and then lamely lie that you are over them.



Holly is lured to an intervention by Heidi and Spencer. She immediately orders a marg with Petron. Spencer is very reasonable, he suggests that she should not have a dance off in front of people she may want to network with. (My husband suggested that she actually lost the dance off...with herself. It was pretty bad dancing.)

Brody and Kristin have a little heart to heart about her feelings for Justin while Justin goes to meet Audrina for a drink at a secluded bar. She just wants to make sure that things are not weird between them. Justin seems to be kind sad. He is mad that Audrina has been dating his friend but doesn't get why she is acting this way trying to hurt him. He would never be able to say that "anything is better than Audrina Patridge, ever in my life." What is going on?

The City


Also missed an episode of the City. Joe was impressed with Olivia but Erin still hates her. Whitney does the opposite of what Kelly Cutrone says and gets bitched at. Her first mistake was to listen to Roxy her second mistake was to take sketches and a dream to Bergdorfs. Did she damage her career as a designer?

On to this weeks episode.

Sammy invites Whitney (and not Roxy) to a party with lifeguards. Will Whitney find a new love interest? She meets 21 year old dudes who look like real nerds. Tomorrow Whitney will be attending a bbq at her exes. (What was his name? Oh yeah Jay.) She was invited by Adam and Alex (remember them). He won't be there but she is going to bring one of the surfers. The surfer brings her brother, Freddie Frackelmayer. He is a fox. (Pardon the illiteration.) He totally looks like a wealthy dude from Connecticut and is in commercial real estate. I like him. Whitney is attracted to him but is concerned there is something going on between him and Sammy. Roxy advises her to date him anyway, although she gives terrible advice, I would go on a date with Foxxie Freddie Frackelmayer, too.



Roxy is on a date and complaining about how no one invites her. She also volunteers to stay late at work so Whitney can go out and have fun. I think she is angling to take over Whitney's job.

Erin has to chaperone Olivia at an Elle party and hates it. She meets the hostess and is a hit. She knows everyone. Erin is clearly annoyed by her popularity and leaves early. She seems to be in a foul mood when she leaves. She and Olivia then have a terribly uncomfortable cubicle conversation. Erin wants her not to have some respect for her. She has been doing this for four years and just because Olivia knows some designers she hasn't earned it. (Where are the exclusives?)

Without trust your lost :Life Lessons from Lily Bass Humphry

Rufus getting married
At the beginning of the episode:
Serena and Lily are on the outs but she is in love with Carter. Carter is working hard to collect money from outstanding debts.

Lily and Rufus are not getting along.

Dan is in love with Olivia but avoiding Georgina. Georgina goes psycho at the thought of him seeing someone else.

Vanessa is pining away for Scott and hating keeping his secret. When Georgina returns all hell breaks loose. She blackmails Vanessa but this backfires and she finally tells. He makes a lame attempt to trick Georgina and she is not fooled.

Bree and Nate are in love. Bree is hunting for Carter and will do anything to use her family's hatred for him to get back in good with his fam.

Lily and Rufus reconcile with a little help from the kids. They are all set to get married finally. They are going to do it at the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens planned by Serena, Blair, Jenny and the new mean girls both Jenny's and Blair's. The wedding is going to be lovely and wonderful but Georgina brings back Scott and tries to ruin their wedding. They call it off and Bree Buckley captures Carter Basin. Carter, it turns out, is the fiance who ran out on Bree's cousin at the alter after using her money to pay off his debt.

In the end Rufus and Lily go to find Scott and get married. They have a happy little family reunion and a guest appearance from Sonic Youth (not looking too youthful these days I might add).


Enough about Eve


This episode is full of Deception.


Serena tries to win Carter Basin back from the Buckleys in a high stakes poker game. She got into the game through Nate who is really just using Serena to leak a fake photo of his cousin to the Buckleys. He is trying to make the Buckleys look bad and get Trip elected. Serena is none too pleased when she learns the truth and goes back to PJ Buckley(who is described as a JR Ewing and rocks a popped polo shirt collar) and settles the debt. Carter is saved by Serena but he wants to pay off the debt to earn her respect.

Blair is so sneaky. I love it. She works so hard to get to give some special toast at NYU. She even uses Chuck and makes him kiss an alum (he is trying to Kiss Chuck as some kind of scavenger hunt). She is vying for the toastmistress position against Olivia(The Duff) and Vanessa.


Vanessa is also willing to do just about anything to give the toast(to impress her judgemental parents- they have a militant stance against private education, knowledge should be free) including lying to Olivia and Dan and tricking Blair into telling everyone just what she thinks of them (and Chuck the truth of what happened). She also is exposed for the liar she is when Dan and Olivia realize they have been duped. She also says in front of her mom that she wishes for different parents. Her mom is not impressed and asks her to consider what she has become.

In the end Blair and Vanessa are disillusioned and slightly ruined. Is Blair going to have to become a good person? She has to go and grovel for forgiveness. Are Blair and Chuck over? Will Vanessa have to become a bad person. Her mom is definitely judging her. Or stranger still will Vanessa and Blair become friends. Weird.



XOXO

I am little bit concerned...We just don't have enough

Roxie's first day. They do a photo shoot for some Jeans. Roxie has to drive Kelly Cutrone's Ford through the city. Kelly is less than pleased with their performance. They forgot the clips that they were asked to bring. Roxie comes up with a good idea to improve the shoot. What if the model took her top off?(I get the feeling that is what Roxie might do.) Whitney tells her to ask Kelly first but she doesn't. Kelly will later say this is a good idea but is pissed that she went over her head to the designer.

Sammy, the buyer from Bergdorfs is back, to let Whitney tell her story. She helps Whitney to realize that she will need to be a little more forceful and stand up for herself.

Olivia is sent on an assignment to buy knockoffs. Joe Zee at Elle hates impostor merchandise. It is a crime. Olivia is really good at buying the knockoffs. She is bossy enough to make it work. Olivia does a pretty good job with purses but doesn't get enough stuff to make Erin happy. I don't think she ever gave Olivia a chance. Don't get me wrong I don't really like Olivia but honestly Erin is making her much more likable because she is so terrible.

I don't really like anyone on this show either.

I think you are the only person I haven't gotten in a fight with, who I first met

Stacie the bartender and Kristin are besties because they are both bitches (their words not mine) and the producers told them to be. (Dee and I are friends because we both know what it is like to have people be jealous of us.)

Kristin tries to meet up with Audrina to talk face to face and be friends, bury the hatchet so to speak. Audrina blows her off and Lo has a nice little lunch to keep the viewers informed about what Kristin is thinking. She is going to go after Justin Bobby.

Audrina thinks that Justin is trying to hang out with Kristin too piss her off. I honestly don't think it has anything to do with her. Audrina is self obsessed and believes in the girl code. Could she be getting dumber? You should hear her talk to this band. I really like your music, I can relate you know relationships and stuff. Uggghh. (Did I mention that I don't like anyone on this show anymore.)

Just when you thought that you couldn't hate Spencer more...enter Enzo. He is an adorable little six year old who lives with their neighbors. The kid loves Spencer and wants to be friends. Heidi thinks that having a kid will make Spencer grow up. (Spencer suggests a cat or a dog, probably a good place to start.) Spencer thinks Heidi is acting crazy, baby crazy. Spencer comes home one day to find Enzo playing his Wii tennis game and eating his cookies. Spencer turns it off mid game and bounces him. He tells him to say goodbye to Heidi forever.

Justin Bobby and Kristin are hooking up at club. He looks totally different. He has shaved, gotten a haircut and put on some suspenders. Audrina is devastated, again. I am beginning to see a pattern. They might actually like each other. They ride on the motorcycle together. Hey, that used to be Audrina's seat!

By the way, sandals are not shoes.

Blair continues to struggle with finding her niche at NYU. She looks for the Masters of the Universe Society. She finds them; nerds that love Skeletor, Heman, and Shera. Unfortunately these were not the Wallstreet types she had hoped to find. She is longing for the days of Constance and gets a little desperate. She is all to willing to go back to Constance and have 15 year old girls worship her again. In the end Chuck and Jenny work hard to snap her out of this. Chuck uses a little "do you know who I am logic" on her. How could she not know how amazing she is when she scored a prize like the love of Chuck? Chuck also had a photographer take a picture of her and say "aren't you Blair Waldorf? Blair gathers all of those like her, ladies from private schools who are at NYU and did not go Ivy, to try to rule the school.

Dan meets a new lady friend. Hillary Duff is the star of movies akin to the Twilight Series. Dan, of course, has never heard of them. Nate tries to explain them; it's King Arthur with Vampires and she plays a hot Guinevere. (When will this happen in real life. I am already a fan.) When Dan stumbles upon her he is completely clueless. She loves this and relishes being a regular NYU student dating a boy. Dan loves what a regular girl she is and tells her he loves how much less complicated it is than when he dated his ex. She is Vanessa's new roommate and she has to work one night (read go to a premier of a new movie). This is where Dan will figure out who she really is. Will they be able to make it work? Will Duff continue to be on Gossip Girl? I predict two more episodes...maximum. Otherwise I might not be able to stand it.

This episode also marks the return of Lily. Rufus and Serena have been practicing the moment when Serena will tell Lily she is no longer going to attend Brown. She is less than thrilled. Serena tries to get a job in fashion to show that she can be productive and responsible. Unfortunately no one will will hire her. In steps a PR woman who manages Duff and a horribly tempermental diva, Tyra. Tyra is looking very skinny these days which is accentuated by her giant head and hair. She plays an insecure actress (insert your own joke here...too easy). The PR lady is trying to use Serena and puts her in an awkward position. Serena does the right thing and gets fired. In the end Tyra turns out to be pretty nice and lobbies for Serena to get her job back. Will this be what she does this entire season? (I want to get back to the Carter plot which was disappointingly absent from this episode. I am still intrigued.)

Also back this episode Jenny and Eric. Jenny is excited to live out her days at Constance free of suppression. In the beginning she has moving little speech allowing her subjects to live free from headbands and hierarchy. Unfortunately they don't want to be free and call in Blair to restore order. Jenny eventually has to take back the throne so that no one else will. Chuck also helps her to see that this is what she was meant to do. (Chuck was so full of logic in this episode and reference Dumbo.)

This episode ends with Vanessa calling Scott to say how much she misses him. Unfortunately he is due to meet up with Georgina.

Next episode; Rufus and Lily are going to get married, Georgina is after Dan and will be exposing the truth of Scott's secret or at least threatening to. I do not like Georgina. There are starting to be too many extra people for me to keep track of.

It's on

The Hills and The City returned last week with little to no fanfare. Maybe it is because I am such a busy person that I haven't had much time to watch MTV but I really think that it has something to do with the fact that things are looking less than interesting. They have added some new characters to try and spice things up but truthfully things aren't looking so good.

THE HILLS



Is it just me or do you hate Kristin Cavallari, too. There is something about a girl with a raspy voice like that makes me think she is trashy. Maybe I am still bitter about LC being gone. The Hills begins with a little reminiscing. Remember how Brody and LC met? Well, Kristin slapped LC on the street in front of a bar (this is also the plot of an episode of Cops isn't it.) Heidi and Spencer throw themselves a welcome home party. Moments into the party Stephanie and Audrina are in a screaming match with Kristin complete with threats of physical violence and cursing. Here is the shocker. They are fighting over Justin Bobby. It seems inexplicable. Justin Bobby is looking a little bit huskier and even dirtier, if that could be possible. He looks like Joaquin Phoenix in his crazy I am not an actor anymore phase. Speaking of strange looks...



Spencer is dressed like a cowboy (I am using the term loosely here. I have been around cowboys and they don't really dress like that. In fact they would probably laugh at him. ) He and Heidi are house hunting. She wants a homey little place with a picket fence and a room to turn into a nursery. Spencer finds a real modern "porno pad" and puts the deposit down on it. Oops he forgot to tell Heidi. Sweet marriage.

Kristin and Bobby go on a date and seem to have genuine chemistry. They are talking about signs. She is a Capricorn. Did this really happen? Did I time travel? When was it cool to talk about people's signs? Anyway they seem like they are going to hook it up and Audrina is devastated.

Memorable quotes:
"We're married. We're not crazy tequila party people." - Heidi (did she forget the first time she got married to Spencer she was drunk from shots of tequilas.

"As a friend, it's girl code." -Audrina (did she forget that she tried to steal Brody from Jayde. Not girl code.)

"Did that go in?" -Kristin is watching a Laker's game and is unsure if the shot went in. How do you not know if the shot went in when you are watching the game.




THE CITY



Just when I thought Olivia was my most hated The City character enter the two new characters. What happened to the daughter of ACDC? At least Erin was likeable, if not exciting at all. Enter Roxy, she is a "friend" of Whitney's from highschool (she looks about 10 years older, too much makeup? too much hard living? you be the judge.) and a fashion girl from LA. She has an interview with Kelly Cutrone set up by Whitney and unbelievably seems ruder/meaner than Kelly. It hardly seems possible. She tells Kelly that she doesn't like bs or girls. Two things I like about her; 1) She wears all black. My favorite outfit color scheme. 2) She used to work for Rachel Zoe...I love her. "I die.") She doesn't even say she really likes Whitney and is shocked by her sudden love of fashion. Of course that will not stop her from later asking Whitney to let her crash on her couch. She and Kelly also have a talk about her sign. She is clearly going to be another anti-Whitney. Also she has a voice like you would expect someone who is named Roxy would.

Whitney is a sucker as usual. She is unable to say no to Roxy's crash on my couch request and then has to talk to the cops when Roxy throws a loud party at her new place that she "didn't send out a mass text to invite people to." She is also trying to start her line and working part time for Kelly Cutrone. No more DVF.

Olivia is up to her same ridiculousness. She is offered a job by Joe Zee(remember she duped him last season into believing she pulled the look that Whitney did) at Elle as an accessories editor. Showing himself as a terrible judge of character and personal interactions he then introduces her to her new boss. He thinks that they will like each other. He is very wrong. This new boss has a very angular face.



Erin Kaplan is not a fan of Olivia and asks her to help pull some affordable summer looks for the Today show. She does a poor job and when Erin calls her on it she yells at her. "If you have a problem you can go back and do it yourself." The big boss at Elle is really unimpressed.

Look forward to two seasons of yelling and fighting on both the Hills and the City. I don't really like it. I don't even know who to root for anymore.

For people like us a degree is just an accessory...No headbands in college...and other fashion advice

It is Friday night and I am home alone with a television remote, a glass of wine and a computer. Two hard truths lay before me. 1) Gossip Girl is back and has been for three weeks. 2) I am so far behind on blogging that my DVR erased the first episode. So get a hat and hold the f onto it (TBTL)...I am giving you two posts in one. We find the gang finishing up the summer and preparing to head off for college. Dan, Rufus, Jenny, and Serena's little brother (what is his name again? Oh, Eric. Totally IMDB'd it. Maybe I forgot about he and Jenny because they are virtually non-existent.) spent the summer in the Hampton's. Serena spent the summer on an ashram, not really, but that is what she told everyone. She was really partying and sleeping around in Europe/looking for her father. Blair and Chuck spent the summer in love and scamming on girls. They had this thing where they tricked women into believing they were going to sleep with Chuck and then Blair would come along and shout at them about trying to steal her man. I didn't really get it, it was some kind of scheme to keep things hot. Eventually Blair tires of this and starts to really mistrust Chuck. Vanessa has been dating a new guy, Scott...the guy who just happens to be be Serena and Dan's half brother. She is put off by Dan's new found money (a wallet with money inside it, riding in a car instead of the subway). Naturally she goes to the Polo match to confront him. That's right episode culminates in a Polo match. Nate takes out his new lady friend, Bree Buckley, for the first time. She is the daughter or a warring political family and they have to avoid the trouble that might occur because of this. At the Polo match Serena is supposed to drop the first ball (puck, birdie, I don't really know, polo is a foreign language to me.). Rufus claims that Lily, who is absent (because of her mother's sickness/her real life domestic troubles ) would be so proud. Serena then makes a giant scene galloping away on horseback and chased after by Carter Basin. The same fellow she has been gallivanting around in Europe with and who she now claims is stalking her. Eventually the truth comes out, after they sleep together, that Carter was helping her to look for her dad and that Serena is desperate to get her dad's attention.


Episode 2:Freshman (Read this post while listening to "Good Girls Go Bad" by Cobra Starship and featuring Leighton Meester on repeat. I love this song. It is stuck in my head at least 3 times a week and I haven't yet tired of it.)

Cobra Starship - New Music - More Music Videos

Serena is headed off to Brown or is she. She is having second thoughts and heads to Chuck's to find her way. Blair is headed off to NYU with high hopes. She is going to live in the dorms to try to gain control of the masses. Things take a turn for the worse when Blair's dorm roommate turns out to be Georgina (Michelle Trachtenberg).Blair's usual ploys to win people over will not work at NYU don't seem to be working and Georgina is making a play to be the cool new freshman. Has she turned over a new leaf? Is she genuinely born again but not too christiany? Chuck is trying to start a speakeasy. Dan is nervous about making friends but is big time because of his New Yorker "20 under 20" installment. Is that a real thing? I don't think it is. Vanessa and Dan are at odds to begin with. Serena finally decides that she is deferring for a year and trying to figure things out. She also gets pissed at Chuck and blows his attempts at getting funding/space for his club. Blair gets majorly desperate and asks Dan to be her date to Georgina's party. The party ends with Dan as king, Blair as a nobody and Georgina and Dan hooking up. Gross! I still don't trust her.

Episode 3: Lost Boy
Serena is deciding to be in a relationship with Carter. (Did I mention I am sick of her? Up until this episode she seems desperate and crazy. What kind of a plan is it to get your dad too pay attention to you through the tabloids. Misguided!) Blair thinks that she is going to be inducted into a secret society and Chuck is trying to get an investor. They are both trying to get the same photograph from a Sotheby's auction. It turns out that this is all a Georgina grab for control. In the end; Georgina is revealed for the evil woman that she is. Dan starts out the episode hooking up with Georgina but ends up remembering how crazy she is. Remember when they first met and she pretended to be Sarah (or some other fairly common name) from Portland.


Scott is not a real student at NYU and the truth is revealed. He is the child of Lily and Rufus. (Still no Lily, by the way) The truth is revealed to Vanessa but not to anyone else and she is forced to keep the secret. Scott tells half the truth saying that he is the brother of Rufus and Lily's son. I don't entirely understand this move. I think it had something to do with sparing his adopted mother's feelings. He has a tearful good bye with Vanessa, but come on, he was totally using her. I have to take a minute and tell you about how creepy I find this actor. There is just something about him I do not enjoy. Of course Georgina finds out all of this and follows him back to Boston to get the dirt. Nate and Bree are still trying to make it work and Bree becomes a little more interesting when she threatens Carter Basin at the end of the episode. I don't know how much life her character has in her but it is worth a shot. She is an actress from another failed CW show that I watched (the entire season of) Privileged.



I wonder what Carter did? Oh well at least Serena and Carter are trying to make it work. In the world of Chuck and Blair, Blair's faith in Chuck has prompted him to do something insane. He is cashing out his Bass industries stock and buying a hotel. What kind of a crazy spinoff show would this create? It might be like Tori and Dean Inn Love only edgier. Look forward to Hilary Duff and Tyra Banks on the next Gossip Girl. What? It sounds like I am making this stuff up.
XOXO

Turtle is depressing in this episode. He is turning 30 and feeling sad because he hasn't really accomplished anything. When he is out driving one of his new fancy birthday presents. He is taunted by Curtis aka 50 Cent for taking out his dad's car. That has to hurt when 50 Cent openly mocks you on the streets of LA. He also made it into a tabloid magazine for dating Jamie Lynn Siegler. The title of the article was "She's going out with him?" which prompts Turtle's mom to call him a loser. Harsh. He finally decides to go back to school, at UCLA's Business school extension program and Johnny is going to pay for his tuition. Vince buys him a car, Jamie buys him a car, and E buys him a nice watch not a bad end to a slightly depressing birthday.

Eric is learning to become a manager, while representing BowWow or Charlie as he is known on Entourage. He is comedian who wrote a tv pilot. They like the show but they don't like him. He is also having a relationship with Ashley. (she might spell it like this Ashleigh, it seems like her character might try to pull this off). I am not a fan of her. I want Sloan to be back and I consider this girl an obstacle to that process.

Vince is celebrating his success and preparing for his next movie by taking the boys to drive farraris around a race track. Pretty awesome.

Overall this episode was adequate. I am looking forward to see how the lonely Vince plot is going to develop over the next few weeks. I have to admit though that it is not as much fun to blog about this show as the Hills or the City. For this reason, and only this reason I am looking forward to the fall.

Ready to make this comeback complete or I'm back bitches

I know, I know, since my summer began and the Hills ended I have really fallen off on my blogger duties. I tried to justify it by saying that there was nothing on but that is a lie. There is always something trashy to watch and be reported on. I have been enjoying some other of life's little pleasures as well; walking to the coffee shop after sleeping in and waking up on my own schedule, reading a book and not falling asleep, and going for a run during the middle of the day. Here is a brief rundown of the shows I have been watching in secret (now not so secret) during my blogging hiatus.


PREP- a new reality show on Bravo. It follows a group of prep school students through their day to day fabulous life in New York. The kids are ridiculous and not all that attractive. It is mildly entertaining but I am pretty sure I am getting too old to watch it.
Real Housewives of New Jersey- Too trashy even for me. I had to stop.
The D List- I love Kathy Griffin. This year boasts some new interesting friends, including; TI, Rosie O'Donnell, Gloria Estefan, etc. Always fun.
Nurse Jackie- New show on Showtime (thank you Direct TV for giving us Showtime for a year). Jackie is played by Eddie Falco of Sopranos fame. She is a very interesting character. She is living a lot of lies.
Weeds- I know, I am late to the party but I love it.
Hung- New HBO show about a down on his luck teacher who is very well endowed and decides to supplement his income by becoming a prostitute. What a sad, sad, look at education? He has to get a second job to survive as a teacher. This show seems depressing and funny at the same time. Anne Heche is in it too. I will keep you posted.
True Blood- Vampires, Bayou, Shape Shifters, Mind Readers, an Oscar winner (Anna Paquin) and love. Need I say more. I am really enjoying it.



Entourage: The first two episodes of the new season.

Drive: Vince is back on top. It is almost time for the premier of the new Scorsese movie about Gatsby and he is learning to drive for his next role, Enzo Farrari.
The boys are almost back to business as usual except E is now a ladies man who is hooking up with new ladies every night. Then Sloane comes back in the picture with a house for E to sublet for a year. I am glad to see her back. She is always such a fashionable dresser. I am keeping my fingers crossed for them to get back together. Turtle is still dating Jamie Lynn-Siegler and Drama is doing well on his TV show but still clueless with women. Ari is still up to his same old tricks. Andrew Klein, tv agent from last season, is doing well at the agency and Lloyd is ready for a promotion. Ari decides to promote Lloyd if he can make it through Ari's 100 days of torture to prepare him to become an agent. Vince completes his comeback on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno and E decides to take the house. The episode ends with Vince alone in an empty house. It's lonely at the top.

Amongst Friends: This episode begins with Turtle bitching about how unrealistic Seth Rogan and Katherine Heigl hooking up is, whilst moving E into his new home. (Knocked Up, I love that movie and am so looking forward to the new Judd Apatow movie; Funny People.) The boys are preparing for the premiere of Gatsby, they are looking for dates and running around town. E has a young girl named Ashley who is stalking him a little but he asks Sloane to go with him. Ari is disappointed to find out that Andrew is having an affair with a Jr. partner at Miller/Gold. Ari was looking forward to having double dates with his Andrew and his wife. At the post premier party E admits that he doesn't just want to be friends with Sloane. They decide that they can't even be friends and E ends up going over to hang out with Ashley.

It's kind of nice not knowing what I'm gonna do next

Heidi begins by daydreaming about her wedding. Real swans, a cake with white cake, white chocolate, mouse, and truffles. You only get your perfect wedding once (and two crappy fake weddings before that).

Things to do before the wedding:
Choose a maid of honor-Holly wins. Stephanie thought that she was going to be the maid of honor. Did she really think that was happening?

Get Mom's blessing-Spencer is begging for forgiveness from Darlene and she chokes out a hesitant blessing.

Dinner to talk LC into coming to the wedding- Brody and Lauren have their last dinner. They exchange stupid talk about their little ears. Brody also thinks that this is a mistake but knows that she will regret it if she doesn't go. He also has a plan to make a fart noise as Heidi walks by him down the aisle.

Bridal shower-Audrina, the most polite of all, points out that someone should be writing down the gifts and who gave them so that Heidi can write thank you notes. Holly might have noticed if she didn't show up late and immediately begin swilling champagne.

Get tuxes-Spencer would like a tux to make him look like the "white Jay-Z."

Ask the minister to leave out the "does anyone have a reason why these two should not be married"- Good thinking Spencer.

Rehearsal Dinner-Holly is trashed and throws a potato across the table ruining Heidi's $10,000 dollar purse. She is then told by Spencer that 25 year old people do not throw food at dinner and to prove how mature she is she throws a fit. Sobbing she heads for home.

Say goodbye to the old gang at the old house- Trip down memory lane, Lo and LC have their last bbq and Stephanie and Brody make up. They hug it out. Stephanie asks again if LC will come to the wedding she is still leaning towards no. "I'll be at her next one." Love it!

Get a Manicure- Holly apologizes for causing an scene and stealing the show from Heidi. Heidi decides not to un-maid of honor her. Bummer. I think Stephanie would have loved to step in.

Worry and Pray about an appropriate church kiss-This hadn't occurred to Spencer until right before the ceremony but he is truly worried about it and truly they did pray.

Finally the time has come for the wedding. Special guests include; Justin Bobby, looking a little bit like a transient, Stacie the Bartender, who came with Charlie, and last but certainly not least Kristin Cavallari. Will Lauren come? Of course, how else will they do the changing of the guard. LC and Heidi have a nice little conversation about how happy Lauren wants her to be and how Heidi is not wearing too much jewelry (she is trying to be nice). The actual ceremony is fine. I am a person who loves weddings. I watch any wedding I can on tv and usually I get choked up. Not this one. I didn't feel a thing. I wonder why? My actual favorite part was when Lo leans over to Lauren and says "Third times a charm, right?"

This episode ends with Kristin Cavallari asking to be set up with single guys and talking about what a good guy JB is (Audrina looks mad) and her catching the bouquet. Simultaneously LC is leaving through a side door and getting into her town car. Goodbye LC. You will be missed.

This picture seems suspicious to me. Audrina, Kristin Cavallari, Stacie, and Lo. Is Stacie going to be a player next season? I really wanted to see the reception. I want to see all the hooking up and craziness and I never got to see any swans. I think my questions could be answered by this show called Speidi:the Wedding Unveiled, unfortunately the awesomeness of this Hills season finale overwhelmed and killed our satellite dish.

MTV Shows

Goodbye LC I will miss you!

You are the person who matters to me most if you are there (subtext: you are more important than even the groom)

Remember the first time that Heidi thought she was going to get married and she looked normal? Well I do and this is different. This was the first dress she chose too bad she didn't change her mind about the guy.

Heidi and Spencer are running around town making amends and wedding plans. I hate the term princess wedding but I like the dress from Monique Lhuillier.

One more episode and LC is officially gone. She is palling around with Stephanie and it is only slightly awkward. Stephanie is trying to force her to come to the wedding, Heidi shows up at Peoples Rev. and Spencer even calls to apologize. LC and the girls go out to lunch and get all nostalgic. Lauren points out they all hated each other at one time or another because of Spencer. It seems she will not be attending the wedding.

Spencer finally decides to talk to LC because Charlie and his sister give him some advice which he actually takes. Heidi also begs him to be the bigger person and grow up. I just really like that Charlie he seems so reasonable (and I liked when he was dancing/rapping in the car). His apology is very sincere and he seems to really be doing it for her.

LC reminds me why I admire her. She lays it all out there. She tells Heidi exactly why she won't come, how much she has changed (for the worse) since being with Spencer, and cites specific examples of ways that Spencer has created negative situations in her life.

Audrina continues to make things awkward with Brody and Jayde. She wants people to "stop talking crap on" her. I absolutely refuse to watch the show with her. She is too dumb for me to stand it.

Kelly Cutrone comes and blasts Stephanie at the Nylon party. She is so ridiculous. Kelly seems so annoyed.

Previews for next week show that Kristen Cavalari is back. She will be the new main character. I had no idea. I don't know if I can watch it.

Music I liked from this show: The Script and Savage.
(am I playing into the hands of the marketing people or what?)

I don't want to be irrelevant

How appropriate Gossip Girl graduation coincides with one of my favorite New Yorker's own commencements. This series finale leaves me wondering what will become of gang next year as they are scattered to the winds of the ivy league colleges. Who am I kidding they are all going to stay in New York.

It seemed like there might be a Gossip Girl revealing but no such luck. Serena also believes that when she graduates she will be free of Gossip Girl and that the last blast will have been about her recent jail time. Gossip Girl ended up outing everyone with the titles that had been saved up over the years, sensational and true. The gang thinks she might be a senior Constance student.

Summer plans, College, and Gossip Girl Title for our cast of characters:
Dan- skulking around New York ,NYU ,ultimate insider (by far the best title)
Vanessa- backpacking through eastern Europe, NYU, no title
Blair- summer in the city contemplating failure of life,NYU,Weakling
Chuck- world traveler,who needs college,Coward
Serena- Europe trip/search for dad,Brown,After graduation irrelevant
Nate-Scheduled to be an intern at the mayors but changes after being hit on by the mayor to backpack in Europe as planned,Columbia,class whore

Serena wouldn't stop looking for the truth about gossip girl so she spilled all of the last secrets. Dan slept with the teacher, Vanessa and Chuck slept together, Blair slept with Chuck's uncle. Yikes.

Gossip Girl's final lesson of the evening is to teach them that they are all gossip girl and they are all bonded together by the truth.

Lily and Rufus smoke pot and drink beer to celebrate the graduation and to maintain the illusion of their youth. The trip down memory lane sparks a proposal. On again.

The search is on for the next queen of Constance. Luckily Blair still has some weight to throw around and she is going to use it to make Jenny the queen.

Chuck leaves and is all over Europe. Blair thinks he is running away. He is really traveling around collecting all of her favorite things and comes back to profess his love. Could there be a happy ending for the two of them? Stay tuned.

Evil Georgina is setting herself up to be a major player next season. She will be the roommate of Blair if she can work it right. We also see that Rufus and Lily's son, Scott, whom they think is dead, will be in New York trying to hang with Dan. He could be cute and charming.

Carter shows up and tells Serena he knows where her father is. He found him in Figi.

Question: What does it mean to loop someone? That is how Dan found Serena after the grad party at Nate's. I am so out of it. Am I irrelevant?

I don't know if I've ever made someone cry before

I can see Lauren slowly removing herself from the show. She can't even remember if she has ever made anyone cry before and soon she won't even be able to go to the video to check to see if her statements are true. Only two more episodes that include Lauren. Are they really going to keep it going without her?

Heidi's dad is coming to LA. He is a cowboy with a gun. No kidding I have experience with cowboys and he is the real deal. He has a handlebar mustache, a cowboy hat, denim shirt, and Carhart jeans. I hope he shoots Spencer. Unfortunately Heidi's dad seems to like Spencer and maybe even relate with him. He and Spencer go for a walk together and Spencer asks him for permission to marry Heidi, well sort of.


Audrina is working on the White Tie Affair video shoot. I know you are thinking the same thing as I was, who? They have a song and have apparently "worked" with Audrina before. Stephanie and Audrina go out for drinks with some of the guys but in a surprising twist she heads for the hills (haha) when she hears the guitarist lives with his girlfriend. Good for you Stephanie.


LC has to fire Stephanie. We all know it but we have to wait until nearly the end of the episode. Awkward. Lauren maybe should have taken her out of the very public office. Stephanie bursts into tears. It was pretty anticlimactic though. She knew that this could have been the consequence of her screw up and was sad but accepted the termination. (Is that what you call it when you are fired from an internship?) Stephanie tells Heidi and seems upset but in the same breath tells her about the guy from the band. She's over it.

Spencer takes Heidi on a Ferris wheel to propose...again. He has to do a lot of talking her into it. She wants apologies to her mom and LC and a princess wedding. Spencer agrees to it all. She loves the ring so that makes up for a lot. I will nickname the ring Stacie so I won't forget those things that it is making up for.

This is my moment. I own Prom.

What made Lily the woman she is? We get to have these sweet flashbacks into Lily's youth in California. I love all the 80's music and clothes. Don't worry Gwen Stefani was there in the 80's singing. (What the hell is Gwen Stefani doing on Gossip Girl? She hooks up with her sister in LA and heads to a coke filled preppy party. Lily meets a cute boy and fights with someone with the last name Vanderwoodson. The cute guys is a real find; great leather jacket, he solves Rubik's cubes, has a little Joaquin Phoenix vibe, and isn't afraid to fight. Then she heads to jail. Sounds familiar doesn't it. Is this show turning into a spinoff? I will be watching it, if for no other reason than to enjoy the 80's.




It is prom week. Dan goes to the jail with a suit and a dress and brings Serena to the Senior Prom. The girls are going to stuff the prom queen ballot box and to hurt Blair. Too bad Chuck is looking out for her and makes sure that she is Prom Queen and having the perfect night. He also gets her the key to the Penthouse at the Plaza for a little after prom party. Why is Chuck being so great right now? Why did he let her go?

In the end:
Lily forgives her mom.
Blair ends things with Nate.
Friends are forever. (Lily and Carole, Serena and Blair)

Next week is graduation.

As long as I don't see his face I'll be good

I have felt that way about Justin Bobby also.

I almost don't even want to blog about this one. I just want to skip over it and go to the next week. I feel like the producers just made this episode to meet the contractual obligations. It is set up for the awesomeness that will be next week.

Justin Bobby is back on the scene. Texting and calling. He wants to hook it back up with Audrina, after he heard that she was with Brody. She agrees to meet him for dinner and comes in guns blazing. She is done with this "she can't do this anymore". She throws every cliche in the book and he runs out into the street to talk with her some more.

Stephanie finally ruins her connections at People's Rev. Lauren is trying to help her figure it out but her mess up makes LC look like a fool. She is supposed to pack clothes for the Smashbox shoot, forgets to do it, then refuses to leave her lunch date and make up for the mistake. Kelly is furious and tells Lauren to fire Stephanie but Lauren heads back to her desk and puts it off for a few more days (she has until the end of the week, Kelly suggests she think guillotine).

Heidi goes to have one last confrontation with Stacie (who uses the word expecially) . I am not sure why this needs to happen. Picture the same conversation that they have had up to now. She does call Heidi crazy which has more and more truth to it. Heidi tells Spencer (who is busy minding his own business and twittering) what she did and he reacts calmly. He seems rational. What?

Can I just say the previews for next week are so sensational. I am counting down the days.

In other words she's a fauxcialite

Runners up for the title of this post:
"Those suits never did fit right."
"That is a Carrie Underwood song not a life choice."
"If you cut revenge out of the Bible there wouldn't even be enough to make a pamphlet."
But seriously fauxcialite. I love it.

Serena wants to trick Gabriel into giving the money back. She tries to lure him back with the "old pregnancy ruse". He says that he doesn't have the money Poppy does. It is very confusing because she said that he had all of it. Dan is freaking out and tells Lily. She says she will take care of everything. She is trying to protect Serena's rep by paying off the investors. Gabriel is off the hook but Poppy has to pay.

The gang realizes they need someone that nobody knows. Georgina is going to prove useful if they can talk her into it. She is crazy and way into God but this could work for the best. She also wants to be forgiven by Blair so she will do it. She gave Poppy all the Bible money to set her up and then she sent her on her way. Poppy is out and not arrested.

Too bad Serena got arrested instead. Lily set up Serena to save face publicly, keep her out of trouble, and teach her a lesson about following mom's directions. Serena is going to spend the night in jail.

All this scheming forces Blair to blame this on Georgina and then turns Georgina back to her old self. "Tell Jesus the bitch is back." Seriously who writes this show.

At some point things took a turn because Dan and Jenny are now okay with Rufus and Lily getting married. Rufus gets Eric's permission and is preparing to propose. Jenny tries to distract Lily while Rufus sets up for the proposal by telling her the entire plot of Twilight. Rufus finds out about the fake payoff that Lily set up to pay for Dan's tuition and the jailing of Serena. She sounds just like her mother. They will not be getting married any time soon.

Blair and Chuck are still in relationship limbo. She can't move on with Nate when he is there playing with her emotions. Is it real what they have together? Chuck let's her go. He doesn't mean it but he does it anyway. That would be the old Mariah Carey If you love someone you let them fly. Blair decides not to move in with Nate, he didn't want it either but they will be attending the prom. (Mariah tangent she was at the Pacquiao/Hatton fight this weekend with her husband and the announcers said "there's Mariah Carey and her crew." Sorry Nick Cannon you are still not famous enough. Although those boxing announcers are a little old and out of it that has to be a blow to one's ego. Also, yes, I like boxing.)

Next weeks gossip girl looks very interesting. Brittany Snow(she is adorable) will be playing Lily in the 80's and we are going to watch a flashback. I can't wait. This is a picture from the well regarded movie John Tucker Must Die. Yes, I watched this movie more than once. In my defense HBO constantly played it last year.

Deliberately... Maliciously...Skankily

Stacy texts Spencer and asks him if he is going to HWood. Heidi like any trusting girlfriend-turned-fiance-turned-wife-turned-girlfriend checks his phone, erases the message, and goes in his place. Stacy and her posse roll up to Heidi at HWood and sit down. Heidi wishes this upon her. Stacy's reply,"when I am gone there is going to be another girl. There is going to be another Stacy." Impressive

Equally crazy. Frankie is throwing a party and Audrina decides to show. She has now changed her tune and does not want to fight Jayde. She is actually lying about what happened. So is everyone else, I mean unless, they actually did just fall asleep in Brody's bed talking about Jayde and JB. I know Jayde was a playmate but she is not that stupid. Audrina seems to think that she and Brody are going to develop some relationship, or thinks that she has more of a tie to him. She is busy telling Stephanie how sure she is. When they see each other out again Brody does not stand up for her and sends her packing. She is crying and sloppy drunk. How could he choose his girlfriend over her? She does not understand how cheating works.

On a personal note: I am very sick of those voices. I am sure you are familiar with the sound. They have a strange inflection and could be said to be talking in questions (Michelle coined that phrase and I like it) They are also higher pitched and just downright irritating. I have noticed that not only does Paris Hilton have this voice but so do the Kardashian sisters. Audrina uses this voice as do many of our reality tv friends. Stacy the bartendress has a very strong stupid voice although I think she may be prophetic in the there will always be another Stacy. She isn't as dumb as she seems. I think that this is a new way to play dumb or maybe it is an old way. I think Marilyn Monroe sounded something like that. I hate to equate her with the likes of these reality personalities.

Back at couples therapy; Spencer is incensed by the fact that Heidi is looking at his phone. Violation of trust. Heidi is sick of hearing about Spencer's feelings. He is allowed to share them (the therapist said) ad naseum. Well Heidi is nauseous and I am shocked. She knows what that means. Where am I?

Audrina shows up for a debrief meal with Lo and LC she is wearing a crazy Boy George hat and whining about how Brody would not stick up for it. LC then goes and have lunch with Brody and tell him to be nice and apologize. He has to stick by Jayde.

Spencer has an alone ses. with the therapist. He still doesn't know what to do. He actually sounded like he had thought about it and was not being a defensive ass. Am I on Spencer's side? Luckily I don't care enough about either one of them to take a side.

Upcoming: Heidi goes to yell at Stacy again and Audrina finally gets rid of JB. Could this new found empowerment have something to do with the fact that Audrina has her own spin off in the works. Honestly, even I don't want to watch that.

NYU? What was I thinking? You know how I feel about ironic facial hair.

Nate is giving Blair a subway riding lesson. She doesn't want to go because it is full of "molemen and middle class professionals." Sounds horrible doesn't it? Nate is starting to freak out about being all the way across the city from Blair. He gets an apartment halfway between both places, in Murray Hill. Gasp!(and to stick it to Chuck). Chuck and Nate are playing basketball and Chuck is dressed in polo shirt, a zippered sweatshirt and an ascot. What? There is friendly banter which leads to a little smack talking and the game begins. Chuck and Nate are competing for Blair and her attention.

Chuck tries to reel her in by involving her in a mystery. The mystery of Gabriel. Is he back together with Poppy Lifton? They have a huge blowup fight and Poppy threatens to make all of his investors back out. Luckily they are at a cocktail party with tons of possible investors. Gabriel says he met Serena long ago, before they were married in Spain, the night that Georgina roofied her. Too bad she can't remember.

Chuck and Blair seek Georgina. She is at some crazy God camp because that was the way out of boot camp. She seems to buy into the Lord. After Blair realizes she has become a pawn in the battle between Chuck and Nate she takes off and leaves Chuck in the woods with the Jesus freaks. Chuck calls a cab and Georgina takes a day off in the city.

Blair is angry with Nate because she realizes the apartment was not for her benefit. It was just to prove that he had won. Nate does not really trust her.

Unfortunately the scheme that Poppy and Gabriel have been cooking is not found out quickly enough to save Rufus from investing in it. He is still trying to come up with that darn Yale tuition.

Turns out Poppy and Gabriel are liars. They are using all this money but we don't know what for. Isn't Poppy an heiress or something akin to that? Next week looks to be a sorting out of this weeks follies.

**Programming note. Dangers of the DVR. I am just now watching this weeks GG on a Wednesday evening. (Unfortunately it is NBA playoff time and one can only fight for the remote so much) You may ask "what of any great importance might have been missed on the CW?" I would normally agree but it is a true tragedy. Nick Lachey was on One Tree Hill. Are you kidding me? I need to get on some kind of Nick Lachey mailing list so I don't miss any of his television work. I am bummed. I think he was playing himself, the best possible character he could play. Damn.

In the Bible it's called fornification

What does this tattoo mean? Audrina is rumored to have this and it seems to have a lot going on.


That's right this week they brought in an even more vapid player. I am still scratching my head and trying to figure out why. Colby and his girlfriend were on vacation in LA. They go on a double date with Spencer and Heidi. It was very strange. Spencer kept asking questions of them like they were from another planet and the girlfriend insulted Heidi by pointing out how different she looked. (I think the insult was the reminder of how she used to look like a human being not that she was ugly before) Spencer and Colby go to a gym to box and then Colby offers to show Spencer some Bible verses. Spencer agrees to this and is condescending/texting for the entire event. It was all too confusing and this episode leaves me wondering what was the point of it all.

Audrina's crash the boys' trip plan really pays off. They drink and sunbathe and drink some more. The culmination of this is when Audrina stays the night in Brody's room. Brody is not proud but honest when debriefing with the boys. "I cheated on my girlfriend." (He is telling Doug, Frankie, and my personal fave, Sleazy T) Did she do this because she has always had a crush on Brody or because she wanted to make JB jealous? A little of both I would wager. I am now adding person with good judgement to Audrina's resume which already included budding physicist and MENSA member. I just am annoyed by the fact that she didn't have any remorse about being a homewrecker. I had a strong reaction to her sluttiness. I mean she ends this episode by saying Jayde should bring it. What is she...I can't think of the proper thing to equate her to...something akin to a girl standing in front of her locker and talking about how she is going to kick someone's ass.



Ghost Whisperer update: Melinda Gordon (JLH's character) is pregnant with Jim's baby. I am very excited about this news which most people who know me can tell you is a really big deal. Babies usually freak me out. (How sad that this made me say to myself: "Wow a lot of people around me are having babies." Umm..don't worry I still have firm hold on the line between fantasy and reality) In Jim news he finally remembers who he is so we usually just see Jim even though he is in Sam's body. Confusing I know but still exciting. Things are falling into place. The only really weird thing is that the Jamie Kennedy/JLH love has created a weird dynamic on the show. Maybe I am imagining it but they have some weird tension. They act strangely around one another, like they are trying too hard to not act like there is something going on.

I always pictured you as the next Hillary...except I'd win

A wordy post.

This episode begins with a mystery. Serena has been gone for quite some time but Chuck saw Poppy Lifton, the socialite she was originally with on her trip, at a bar. What was she doing while gone ?

Blair is very busy ingratiating herself into Nate's family and social life. Nate got in at Columbia on his own but Blair is busy avoiding thinking about college. Her stepfather, Cyrus (anybody want a peanut), offers to get her into NYU and she makes a snide remark about non-ivy, lesbian trying, 8-time-beloved-reading schools. I love her witty remarks about various college stereotypes. They never get old. She is really hoping to be on the Whitney Junior Committee. So Blair makes a deal with the devil. For agreeing to persuade Nate to go to Yale instead of Columbia she gets to be in Nate's cousins wedding and on the committee.

Something strange happened at Nate and his cousins luncheon. It causes Nate to be very angry with Grandfather Vanderbilt and out him at the rehearsal dinner (for turning in Nate's father). What will happen to Blair's big plans? Grandfather tries to get Blair to help him but her conscience wins out in the end. Not before grandfather sells her out, revealing the truth about their deal.

More is revealed about Serena's mysterious trip. She calls Cyrus because she needs a lawyer. Before meeting with him she gets a tongue lashing from Lily who tries to ground her. She immediately leaves.

Dan and Rufus are worried about Dan's tuition. Dan takes a catering job that turns out to be at Blair's moms. They are having Seder dinner. Dan is in the right place at the right time to hear Serena's secret. She accidentally got married in Spain to Poppy's ex. Oops. Funny enough Rufus ends up as a guest where Dan is working. Small world. Even funnier Serena's husband turns up at the dinner. Serena works hard to get rid of him by talking about how in love Dan she is with Dan but then Eleanor turns up to invite him.

The Seder is very awkward with all the lying and confusion. Is Dan a waiter or a guest? Is he Serena's almost brother or boyfriend? Finally Gabriel leaves and Serena goes after him to find the truth. She was not married and they are going to give dating a go. Also, Serena got into Brown. Go Bears!


Could Blair be anymore tragic? Now Nate is through with her. What will she do? Nate and Chuck get together and commiserate about Blair or their tragic lives. I can't be sure which. Chuck finally apologizes for whatever he did to Jenny Humphry, I can't really remember. I know it was bad.

This episode ends with Nate forgiving Blair and asking Cyrus to get her into NYU. Is she going to get boring? She is changing and not for the better.

OMG one last twist. Poppy and Gabriel have something still going on. She asks him to tell her everything. Are they setting Serena up for something sinister? What is happening?

I love him but I don't know if I am in love with him

Disclaimer. This picture is almost too gross for me to look at. He creeps me out.

This episode marks the long awaited return of Justin Bobby. He was "acting all shady" at Coco DeVille. Stephanie Pratt, ever the relationship Pollyana says that maybe they can be friends. JB wants to communicate (and asks her not to burp him when she is patting him on the back, weird) but Audrina wants to feel special. Dilemma.

Audrina is then comforted by Brody. His girlfriend, Jayde, is suspicious. Jayde decides that she will put her collagen injected lips all over Brody to mark her territory. Brody then tries to council JB at another bar later in the week. Audrina is making weird eyes at Brody and something is brewing. Audrina wants him...she wants to crash the Hawaii vacation that Brody and co. are planning but not a anything serious "expecially" (just to be clear that is Audrina verbiage, not my own) not a boyfriend. LC, Lo and Audrina are going to Hawaii.

Sleazy T cameo. Oh I love him. If you aren't familiar with his work check out Bromance.

It is finally dawning on Spencer that Heidi is serious about therapy. Brody calls and invites him to Hawaii for the all-dude-surf-trip. Spencer lies to keep out of trouble. He is fake in Vegas. The therapist seems nice. The first thing she says is "this sounds all really high school to me." Heidi accuses Spencer of being checked out and the therapist asks what she is still doing in the relationship. Wow heavy hitter. She is asking the tough questions after 2 minutes (magic of tv?)

LC is feeling the heat of helping to hire Stephanie. It is very apparent that she is too dumb for this job. She can't check in jewelry on the computer or fold things without leaving crumbs. I can't wait to see Kelly Cutrone destroy her.



I enjoyed the MTV movie awards promo that introduces Andy Samberg as the host of the show this year. He is introduced as the spawn of Jack Black and Michael Cera. Funny. I could see him as a cross between the two. I love Michael Cera.

I didn't know you had these sides to you

This is a quick and dirty run down. Everyone annoyed me this episode.

Kelly Cutrone tells Lauren they need a new intern. She tells her to be very careful about who she refers and then she refers Stephanie Pratt anyway. Stephanie acts unbelievably stupid in her interview and Kelly Cutrone makes fun of her but hires her anyway (she is no fool. this is free pr for her company). She brings a resume and writes her life goal as her objective. She wants to be a handbag designer. Good for her.

Heidi returns from Colorado and she an Spencer are still fighting. Spencer asks about "his favorite person Darlene" (very sarcastically) and turns it around on Heidi again. How could she see Colby? He also blatantly lies about seeing Stacy the bartender when she was away. He can't believe she is even asking him about this right now.

Charlie, Spencer's new hired friend, and Spencer are driving and dancing in the car to HWood. Spencer knows that this is a place where Stacy and her friends hang out. Stephanie uses her extensive club knowledge to figure out where Spencer might be. Heidi comes in guns blazing. "What the f are you doing?" Charlie tries to jump in and gets a finger in his face and yelled at by both girls. Stephanie plays the part of friend calling Stacy a slut, homewrecker, and asking if she even has any pants. I like that a lot.

The next day Heidi and Spencer meet for lunch. Heidi was humiliated. Spencer is smarmy and pissed off. "She couldn't even be closer to you if you tried. I'm done with you. I'm done wit this." She doesn't want to look at, talk to, or be near him. She is very convincing. Heidi provides Spencer with an ultimatum; either go to therapy or they are done.

Everything happens for a reason

HAPPY EASTER!
Could my life get any better? It is spring break and last night was the premier of the final season of the Hills. Two episodes; starting with the episode where Spencer punches someone in the face. Sweet.

The episode begins with LC's birthday. The girls decide to throw her a surprise party on a boat. Cruise around, drink, and gamble. What could go wrong? Heidi. Stephanie, ever the incendiary, talks Heidi into crashing the party. So now they are all trapped on the boat. Heidi is again working hard to have an awkward confrontation with Lauren. It is less distressing then other times that this has happened but Lauren held her ground with the, I miss you, but I hate Spencer.

Meanwhile, Spencer is having guys night with his mustachioed friend. (I believe it was someone hired off the street. Who would choose to be friends with Spencer?) The boys head to a bar and is hitting on the cute bartendress. Cameron, Stephanie's ex, shows up and Spencer is rude to him (surprise, surprise). Cameron texts Stephanie with the news about Spencer's flirting. Stephanie tells Heidi and Heidi calls Spencer. Spencer is incensed. He was not flirting. Can't a guy buy a girl some shots and ask her about what it might take to get her dancing on the bar. (Incidentally, it is "Pour some sugar on me." Predictable. I will add that to my list of songs drunk, white people like to sing along with. Other songs; Benny and the Jets, Journey songs) Spencer wants to talk to Cameron. He gets in Cameron's face and is asking for him to "touch him." He wants an excuse to hit him. Then decides he doesn't need it and sucker punches him in the face. Unfortunately, Cameron does not stand up for himself and people break it up before any fists can connect with Spencer's face.

Heidi, is in hysterics and is "leaving." At this point, I secretly hope that she will jump off the boat. No such luck. Instead she and LC have another weird crying talk. The best times of Heidi's life were with Lauren. She misses her so much. It seems confusing because I thought that she was upset about Spencer. LC takes this opportunity to take a few more digs at Spencer. He is a bad guy and mean. Heidi seems only half listening and conveniently does not hear the Spencer criticism.

LC, Audrina, and Lo have a debrief about the party. It was fun but LC was not a fan of being trapped on the boat with Heidi.

Next Episode:

The next day Heidi goes to the bar to talk to the bartender. She says that if she was in Heidi's position she would be mad.

Spencer is upset that Stephanie would tell Heidi about his alleged flirting. How dare you "show someone a text message without checking with me first?" Stephanie tells Spencer he is so obsessed with loyalty he will end up alone.

Heidi confronts Spencer and then packs her bags to go home to Colorado. Spencer tries his usual make her seem crazy and turn it around on her. He is upset with her for making him always be by her side and not letting him go out more often. Can't she see that it is all her fault? He also does not remember asking the cute bartender about dancing on the bar. Can she prove it. I wish she would run down to the MTV video trailer and demand to see the video.

Spencer calls Brody to get some advice. Brody says that if she went to Colorado all bets are off. Go out with the guys and see what else is out there.

Heidi is in Colorado receiving advice about Spencer from her mother. She runs into her high school boyfriend, Colby. Mom is sure that this is happening for a reason. The reason being Spencer is an awful human being.

Spencer heads back to the bar and flirts with the bartender some more. She calls Heidi crazy and asks Spencer what will happen next. They are planning to go on a date.

LC and Brody are shocked by the strange reality that they have stepped into. Heidi and Spencer now need LC and Brody after they were jerks to them. How strange.

Look forward to a season of crazy. LC getting a job at People's Revolution for Stephanie, (I know Kelly Cutrone is going to love Stephanie) Spencer and Heidi getting married again (maybe it will take this time), and Brody and Audrina hooking up (What happened to Justin Bobby and the gross ring that came out of his mouth and went on Audrina's finger at the end of last season.)

One other MTV item of note. I was having a wonderful visit (catching up on the gossip) with one of my great friends and we left the tv on while "Taking the Stage" was on. This is a show about kids who go to the school for Creative and Performing Arts in Cincinatti. The kids were getting ready for a performance. The teacher in charge reminded them that they needed to be ready because a lot of "Cincinatti Dignitaries" would be there. This phrase really stood out to me and I wondered who on earth they could possibly mean.

That's right. You guessed it, my favorite and yours, Nick Lachey. I love him. He was just going to support the kids. He is an alum of this school. What a great guy.


GOSSIP GIRL: Programming note. No new GG until April 20th. Are they on Spring Break too? What is wrong with you CW?